Hey, There!
I'm Ruth.

Every woman is unique. Each one of us brings something different and equally valuable to this world. Sure a great many of us feel that we're plain and ordinary and not much to look at, but in reality, those around us all know the value we bring.

You are beautiful. Unconditionally.

It has taken me most of life to learn to love my body, my face and my soul. From birth we are set up to be anxious about appearance, behaviour and performance. Women are consistently judged by these three points.

I am a disabled, pretty plain to look at, somewhat overweight, multicultural, lesbian feminist and Ill hope you'll join my journey in liberating womenkind for all generations now and in the future.

I am recognised by most as one of the poster women in the Scottish Equal Marriage campaign, and a vocal lesbian feminist.

Im also a digital entrepreneur and outspoken on economic empowerment for disabled and mature women and mothers of young children.

 Background

I was born in South Africa to a British father and a South African Mom. I grew up during the most violent years of the apartheid era and witnessed the end of the regime.

I was for all intents and purposes raised by a black woman, who although she held the status of a nanny, she was my mother .

I found it really distressing that the woman who had nurtured me from infancy was supposedly my enemy, according to the education delivered under the apartheid government. This left me with a sense of cognitive dissonance and gaslighting on a scale that has left its mark for life.

Despite realising around the age of 12 that I was a lesbian, I naively thought that I could fix it, married at a young age, believing it would fix the problem. Of course it did not.

A violent marriage ended in animosity and led me to marry and live in the closet with a bisexual man, doing so to ensure that I was appointed the resident parent. He was a really good man and Dad to my children.

Eventually, I could no longer live a lie and came out aged 40 thinking that it would be safe and that the world had moved on. Quickly discovering how mistaken I was, I became an equal marriage activist and met and married a transwoman.

I had an epiphany and realised how I had been damaged by misogyny, the apartheid system, religious extremism and years of childhood abuse, crowned by the suicide of my late father.

Something had to change. And this is much of my mantra. Change one thing at a time and the cumulative effect will show. I know. I have done it.